by Fielding Goodfellow
It was a long time ago, but it has lingered with me forever. In a rather juvenile attempt to find ourselves, we wound up finding each other. The three of us. We were inseparable that summer, feeding each other’s minds and souls and saving each other from the impending madness that was attempting to engulf us. We never thought about it, really, but we instinctively knew exactly what each of us needed. We needed each other. A lifetime has passed since the three of us were together, but when I walked into that hotel lobby, it was as if it had all happened yesterday.
I had no idea what to expect, and there was some trepidation in even attending the pseudo reunion that had been in the works for months. We lived in three different countries and had little contact with each other over the years. We could have all changed over the forty years of separation, but as soon as Jess and I saw each other, we were exactly where we were in 1974, when she stood at my cabin in the great Canadian north, with Marcie at her side, and asked if I had a cigarette. We had lived our lives, raised our families been through hell and back several times, but we hadn’t really changed. We were still the same hippie misfits, talking about writing, and music, and listening to Yessongs in its entirety.
They seemed happy, having found wonderful partners in the two kind and generous men who loved them dearly. I was happy for them. We all wandered around my city, laughing, eating, talking, and remembering that summer so long ago. Interestingly enough, Jess had said that she had spent over thirty years trying to locate me, and I, well, I had never stopped trying to find her either. I wish they could have stayed longer. I wished we could have returned to the north, hung out at the waterfall, and the fish hatchery. I wish we could have trekked over to the General Store in Ullswater. But perhaps it’s only the sentimentality that seems to have emerged in full force during the dessert course of my life. They say that you can’t go back, but it appears that we never really left the summer camp that we met at all those years ago. Nothing has really changed. Oh, we are certainly older and I hope much wiser, but our souls continue to soar above the mundane and the meaningless.
I don’t believe that our meeting was purely by chance. I never did. We needed each other then, and I’m sure that we still need each other now. I hope that we will keep in touch, I mean, as weird as it seems, I was closer to these women than I was to anyone else from my past. And as hard as it sometimes is for me to say, I love them both, and I’m certain I always will.